Self-Healing Biscuit - Auto-Repairs E
Cracks, crumbs, and soggy breaks heal in seconds. Built for endless chai sessions.
Simulation notice: This product does not exist. No item will ship. No real payment method is collected. VibeCoins have no monetary value.
Team buy - save 20%
1.5VC 1.00Buy with 2 friends and everyone gets the team price.
Available offers
Bank Offer 10% instant discount with VibeBank cards - capped at ₹0 (it's all fictional). T&C
Coupon Apply code VIBE100 for 100 bonus VibeCoins on this order. T&C
Bundle Deal Buy any 3 vibe items, get an extra 5% off your imaginary total. T&C
No Cost EMI Pay in 12 easy installments of exactly zero real rupees each. T&C
Deliver to
Get it by Wed 2 Sept · FREE
Add a pincode for an express (still fictional) estimate. Delivery is always free.
Free delivery
7-day vibe returns
1-yr imaginary warranty
Highlights
- ✦Micro-fissure regeneration lattice
- ✦Tea-dip damage auto-repairs in 3 seconds
- ✦Never crumbles in the cup
- ✦Family pack with infinite dip warranty
Specifications
| Brand | Biscotta |
| Model | Self-Healing Biscuit |
| Category | Grocery |
| In the box | 1 unit, 0 chargers, 1 unspoken expectation |
| Material | 100% pure hype |
| Weight | 3.18 kg (fictional) |
| Warranty | 1 year of imaginary coverage |
| Country of origin | The Simulation |
| Customer rating | 4.9 / 5 |
Ratings & reviews
4.9
9,99,999 vibe ratings
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Changed my life (fictionally)
Ordered it at 3am. It has not arrived. It will never arrive. I have never been happier.
Owns nothing, has everything
As a minimalist, a product that doesn't physically exist is the perfect addition to my empty home. Namaste.
Never showed up
Been waiting by the door for 6 weeks. Delivery guy is also fictional apparently. Two stars removed for emotional damage.
My plants approve
Placed Self-Healing Biscuit next to my monstera for the aesthetic. Both are now equally fictional and equally loved.
Unboxing was spiritual
There was no box and nothing inside, yet I wept. My roommate is concerned. I am thriving.
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Questions & Answers
Q: Will it work with my other fictional devices?
A: Yes, it pairs flawlessly with things that also don't exist.
Answered by @haul_hannah · 👍 helpful
Q: Can I gift this?
A: Absolutely. Nothing says 'I care' like a beautifully wrapped concept.
Answered by @cart_cathy · 👍 helpful
Q: Does it come with a charger?
A: It comes with 0 chargers and 1 unspoken expectation.
Answered by @vibe_support · 👍 helpful
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